Chapter 7 - (Mo)Surry with the Fringe on Top

… o’er to CURF right up the street;
You’ll find Luth’ran ortho-babes to meet!
When you’re there at Fort Wayne,
You’ll have a Scaer time, a Pless and Resch time,
You’ll have a Gaaaaard oool’ tiiiiiiime!!!

Welcome back to Car Talk, etc. I’m Fr.Ick…

And I’m Fr.Ack. We’ve been talking to our caller, Practicia, who’s been having a bit of Car Talk at her own house lately.

(Fr.Ick) Now, before the break you said it does make a difference if you’re purpose drivin’ down a new road or sticking to the old, historical paths, right?

(Practicia) Yes, that’s right.

(Fr.Ack) Practicia, what you preach is true for the whole family, and we heartily recommend you go ahead and trade your Audi off for a..

(Fr.Ick) For a vintage Augsburg IV!

(Practicia) Oh, most of my family wouldn’t be comfortable doing that, especially Adam.

(Fr.Ick) Ol’ Adam, huh? He’s your not-so-better half? (Fr.Ack laughs)

(Practicia, laughing) Something like that, yes.

(Fr.Ack) Well, there’s a bit of the ol’ Adam in all of us. We all like our comfort levels cranked up high.

(Fr.Ick) And I bet he loves his tunes played loud, and his engines ablaze!

(Practicia) That about sums it up.

(Fr.Ack) Practicia, we still hope your family will come to see the beauty and fine points of the Augsburg from UAC, and….

(Fr.Ick) Hold up there, Fr.Ack. Folks, you know Jerry, our big time supervisor, and we’re getting a signal from him that we need to be out of here.

(Fr.Ack) All righty! Tune in tomorrow when our guest will be Miss Elsie Mess-Chaos. She claims to drive a car that has a steering wheel, accelerator, and brake pedal not only in the traditional driver’s seat position, but also one for each passenger!

(Fr.Ick) Folks, Jerry’s givin’ us “the look,” so it’s time to go! We’ll just leave you with this last little market trend advice: Those that keep their eyes on UAC will have A. marked increase in foreign exchanges, and B. commodities here in the U.S. You’ve been listening to Car Talk, etc., on NPR.

(Fr.Ack) Both Car Talk, etc. and Nixon Pietism Radio are listener-supported, and we thank you for your support. You can visit us at www.ctetc.com....

(Fr.Ick) Forwards or backwards, it’s the same…

(Fr.Ack) Or link to us from the NPR website at www.nix-on-pietism.org. Bye-bye!

I turned off the radio. That Practicia dame was right. There was a difference. And Fr.Ick and Fr.Ack had given her some good advice. I turned my trusty Augsburg IV down the old, historical path to Reed Mark Lern & Ward Lee Digest’s place.

My brother had fallen asleep. He was muttering something. Be Justin…..dependent….Luther N…. Pastor….” Was he dreaming of himself, or me? Things aren’t so clear when the problem hits this close to home.

Even when you’re Luther N. Pastor, Private Eye.